Baskers World

Weekend at Bernie’s II

Well hello there my fellow readers at ‘Baskers World’.

Yes it’s been a few days since I’ve updated the latest snapshot into the world that is my life. I’ve been a very busy girl!! So, here we go;


It was a hot day yet again, with a very busy of schedule of meetings, meetings and yes you’ve guessed it, more meetings. I’m beginning to think that perhaps I should go for a world record and see how many meetings I can have in one day…… Do you think it’s been tried before?

I wonder what the current world record is?

Anyhow, after all of that I was persuaded to go down to the Barley Mow; ; by Kate for Pete’s leaving do.

Only time will tell…..

It was good to be back in the Mow, I hadn’t been there for quite a while since it’s a bit out of the way from HM Treasury, but it’s just across the road from my old place of work in DfT. Which means that I bumped into a lot of old workmates in the pub……..

So, you’ve probably guessed by now, beer was consumed by myself that night. I left at chucking out time, found a taxi, got home and fell into a restless un-sober sleep

My alarm goes off at 7:30am.


I wasn’t supposed to stay out last night. I was supposed to have a couple, go home and get everything packed for WAB II & Dorian’s wedding. Obviously that didn’t happen……


  • I wake up with a stonkin headache
  • I scrabble around for 4head & Nurophen
  • I jump into the shower, willing the painkillers into action and hope that the cool shower will wake me into life
  • Spend at least 30 mins trying to find everything that I wanted to take with me, cursing myself for staying out last night

I finally get into work, straight into yet more meetings! Jings, Crivvens and Help ma boab!


Not a great start to the day… But there is hope! Yes readers, there is hope in the shape of WAB II. I have something too look forward to, something I can focus on, something that can make the tedium of afternoon meetings bareable!

WAB II Begins……

I escape from the office and jump on the 5:07pm train from Victoria to Brighton with the Bernard, Mr Fox and my little pudding (to those of you who don’t know these ‘colourful’ characters are, they are Richard, Cameron and Glen)

We arrive without incident in Brighton, and jump in a cab straight to the Bernard’s ‘Lodge’. Well, that’s not quite true – the Bernard in his haste to stomp off of the train, left the eggs & bread on the train. That was our breakfast for Sunday out of the window!!!

The Bernard showed us to our rooms and with military precision he marched us straight to his local watering hole ‘The Long Man’;

not a bad pub except for the ‘Chav’ element….. Aparantly the Bernard tells us that the next street down from his ‘Lodge’ has a high percentage ratio of Chavs & Chavettes. I would have thought with the Bernard’s masonic connections that he could have had something done about the Chav’s lowering the ‘tone’ of area…. Really, the Bernard should think about getting the other masons worked up into an outrage in the expansion of ‘Chav’s ville’.

Back to the beers. After a few pints, we somehow, find ourselves, god knows how – talking about Chess!!??? The Bernard, being the grand master of all things masonic and Chess, was just so, so arrogant. 😉

The thought of Glen, perhaps beating the Bernard at his beloved Chess was mearly laughed at by the grand master. So arrogant, so greedy! We wandered across to the Bernard’s local curry house for curry washed down with a couple of bottles of wine and the Bernard continued in his greedy arrogance!!! We stomped up the road to the grand lodge of the Bernard for a Chess Grudge match!

Oh the exciting things we get up to on a Friday night in the Bernards lodge…….

The Bernard won. He won big time. Glen & Cameron were completely gubbed. The Bernard is the grand master and will not be beaten.

But he’s still so greedy, so arrogant. :-), that’s why we love the Bernard! Port & Whisky was consumed, then sleep in the wee small hours of the morning.

Breakfast with the condemed man…

We wake up in time to catch a cab to ‘Harry’s’ ;; in Hove to meet up with Dorian for a ‘wedding’ breakfast. The last meal of the condemed man before he get’s married at 3pm.

  • Glen is hungover and feeling very delicate (probably related to half bottle of Port he drank…..)
  • The Bernard is ravenous
  • The fox is waiting diving straight into saturday papers
  • Dorian turns up with his best man, looking very hungover and nervous

4 greedy pile ups, 2 scotch pancakes and toast late,r we begin to feel a bit more human. Well, apart from Dorian, (who didn’t get to bed until 4am) and feels the urge to run home, vomit and powernap before he get’s married.

Dorian and his best man depart, and we wander down to the sea front for a stroll along to the pier. Yes, you have guessed it. DODGEMS!! We perform a precise implementation of the;

  • Sledgehammer
  • Hammer & Sickle
  • Pincer

movements, slamming the Bernard into another dimension. Glen felt a bit better after that, it seemed to do the trick in getting rid of the remainder of the hangover! Arcade machines and crazy golf are done, and we stroll along to the Marina;; , walking past the nudist beach;; – yes people, naked people. Lots of naked people. Old, wrinkly people. Naked people.

It was hot, I was getting sunburnt and needed a nice shaded area and a cool drink. Of course, we find an average watering hole, have a beer and decide that we are a wee bit peckish and could do with something to eat as it’s going to be a long day!

We head to Karma; for some munchies and a bottle of wine, before jumping in a cab back the lodge for bucksfizz in the back garden, before we all get ready and put on our gladrags for the wedding reception.

We catch another cab down to the Grand Hotel and meet up with Joanne who’d travelled down from London that evening. The wedding meal was just finishing, and Mr & Mrs Drake (Dorian & Helen), popped out to meet us and it was into the function room for that start of the night!

It was a fantastic night with wine, food and moshing (yes I said moshing) – the music was just excellent, we had Nirvana, ACDC, the timewarp etc, etc

Oh, the Bernard could mosh. He was jumping about that dance floor like a man possed by the spirit of Ozzy Osbourne, Alice Cooper and Axl Rose – He stomped. I stomped. Glen stomped. Cameron stomped. We even got Joanne to join in on the moshing & stomping!

We stomped and stomped and stomped. Oh how we stomped. Brilliant wedding reception, fantastic music and fantastic stomping. I have more pictures of the various stomping that went on, you should check them out at; – Stomp I dare you!

After all of that, it was a cab back to the Bernard’s masonic mansion for late night drinkies and music, Iron Madien, Pink floyd, Motorhead etc….

Should we stay or should we go?……

We wake up slowly today, it was a late night of music and stomping…. the Bernard cooked us a feast of toast, scrambled eggs and bacon. Last year, the Bernard was very, very anxious to get rid of us so he could have his normal Sunday routine of the Archers, Country File, washing, and various masonic rituals….

This time Cameron and I decided to see how long we could ‘impose’ on the Bernard – we were aiming for 2pm departure.

Oh the Bernard was stomping away around the house, stripping the beds, cutting trees in the Garden whilst we were having a lesuirely read of the Sunday papers whilst listening to the Bernard’s extensive music collection.

The Bernard departs to go ‘shopping’ and leaves us his back door key. It’s only 1pm, we still have another hour to go ;-). We carefully re-arrange some of the Bernard ornements as a leaving present.

Jump in a cab and head down to the station to catch the train back up to London. A quick bite to eat in Noodle, Noodle; for lunch/tea and jumped on the bus home.

I’m knackered and looking forward to sleeping back in my own bed. Back to grind on tomorrow.


This entry was published on August 6, 2006 at 7:33 pm and is filed under Personal Blog. Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post.

One thought on “Weekend at Bernie’s II

  1. Hello! New Mrs Drake here of said wedding. Fabulous pictures of some very drunk stomping. We heartily approve. Loving the rave review by the way. We do however anticipate that it was a one off event…..

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